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I’ve decided to start compiling a list of my international traveling truths. This will probably be an ever-expanding list, that I will update from time to time. Here is the first batch, in no particular order: 1. Chinese grandmas will crowd a gate and it doesn’t matter if you’re Boarding Group 1 and they’re Boarding Group 9… you’re gonna have to throw a bow in her face to get her to move. 2. “Buckle your seatbelt due to turbulence” means “everybody get up and crowd the bathroom” in Asia. 3. Airplane food will never look like what they describe it to be, and it will taste twice as bad as your lowest expectation. 4. Consolidating your air miles to one airline on one alliance is beneficial to your long-term travel health on about eleventy billion levels. 5. Every single person that ever flies through Tokyo on a United flight has status and will be in the lounge. I have no idea how this is a thing, but it is a thing. keep reading
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How do I put the last 5 weeks into words? It’s been a roller coaster, an obscene roller coaster with heights and depths to the extreme, with profanity laced tirades and whispered prayers. I’ve seen and experienced things that still boggle my mind. Here in China, according to my American sensibilities, down is up… up is left… and left leads you into a brick wall.”What about right”, you may ask? Well, right is an ambiguous notion that I’m failing to catch wind of… Not to say things are bad. Not to say I’m miserable. Because that would not be true. No, it’s more that I’m having to rediscover how to live. That I’m seeing how little patience I have for certain things. How exhausting it can be to feel completely uncomfortable because you are so unfamiliar, more often than not. And when you think you’re familiar, or that you know how a certain thing is supposed to go, and then it goes a completely different way than you thought,  and it doesn’t fit in your ill-constructed, shoddily thrown together box, well, you just have to shake your head and throw the box away. keep reading
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I have no idea how often I’ll be posting about my China adventures, what the content will be, anything, really. But hey, let’s see what happens! (disclaimer: I’m hyped up on coffee right now… there’s no telling what’s about to happen.) In 3 weeks I’ve gone from Iceland, to America, to Brazil, to America and finally to China. Sweet Odin’s Raven. Let me tell you this. And I know you mothers out there are going to hate me for this. But because of all this traveling, I temporarily have hate in my heart for babies/toddlers. On my flight to Sao Paulo, there were 7 (SEVEN!) babies that screamed bloody chaos for 9 and a half hours. Not all 7 all the time, but some combination of them THE WHOLE FLIGHT. Fast forward a week to my 14 hour flight from Toronto to Beijing. I have not slept in well over 24 hours at this point. My goal is to sleep for at least half of this flight. I was most certainly tired enough to do it. However, fate thwarted me. For behind me was a husband and wife and their infant child. Their infant baby child that proceeded to kick and shake my seat for the vast majority of the flight. This same infant baby child also proceeded to stand on the tray table and mess with my hair. Repeatedly. Mostly every time I almost fell asleep. I shot dirty look after dirty look back at the parents. I talked to a flight attendant. Nothing. At all. The parents smiled and laughed at their infant baby child that was just sooo cute in its infant babyness. Until I punched it in the face. keep reading
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Apologies in advance if this is a rambling mess.  This is going to come as rather bizarre to some, completely bizarre to others, and a few will say, “yes, of course”. Those people know that the sum of my life is one bizarre incident after another, compounding upon each other, hurtling towards some unknown conclusion, the only known being that whatever it is, it will probably be bizarre. (or something… I’m tired… cut me some slack.) So, with that qualifier out-of-the-way, I’m (temporarily) moving to China. On Thursday. As in two days from today. Yep. There’s more to this than I have time to explain right now, but here’s what I can tell you. I’ve felt a bit of an unsettling this year, not knowing exactly what it meant, but knowing, as has happened in the past, that big change was coming. I ‘ve been pursuing the idea of moving to New York City for some time. I visited again earlier this year, hoping that my heart would be settled on yes or no as to the move. And I truly believed that it was a yes. Actually, I still do. But not yet. And even THAT is subject to change. keep reading
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